Ridiculous Retail Complaints

I came across this "review" of Wal-Mart via STFU Parents.

So this "very upset mother of two" has a "complaint" about Wal-Mart. A'ight, who doesn't have a complaint about corporate this or store policy that or OMFG the service at this place I went to SUCKED BALLS -- but this complaint? This complaint is a fine illustration of everything that is wrong about current parenting trends... and then some.

Cashier and shopping carts not child friendly.

Okay... what the fuck do you mean by "child friendly"? Are you really concerned that children -- well-behaved, socially-adjusted children -- might get hurt by these things? I doubt it. And her story bears that out. Witness:

My mother, daughter, and I stopped at a Walmart store on our way home from vacation. As we were shopping through the store, I let my three year old daughter push one of the carts around the store.

Oooh, okay, so you "let your [toddler] push a cart." In normal English, that translates to "I let my precious little snowflake ram a grocery cart into every set of legs she could find."

I got the feeling that we were given a lot of dirty looks as we went through the store,

Gee, maybe because your demon-spawn was terrorising every calf, shin, ankle, and knee she could get to with that cart?

...but I didn't care.

Obviously, or you'd have had enough sense to kerb your kid.

When we finally got two carts full, we decided to leave.

I'm betting this took at least twice as long as it should have, due to Cznofleykke "helping" with the cart. Really, shopping goes much faster when the grown-ups are in charge.

When I started to unload the carts at the checkout, my daughter started running around the aisles and bathrooms.

Fairly normal-ish kid behavior, yes. However, it's not so much the child that's the problem, here. Read on.

Everytime I brought her back to us, she would run off again.

Which is why you hold on to your kid's hand, or put your kid on a leash, or have Grandmama -- who you've already stated was along to help with the shop -- keep the kid under control for a bit.

I'm sure that we, growing up, pulled a few runners on our parents, both intentional and accidental, and did some annoying things in public, but, um... this kid's behavior, and the mother's complete lack of response, makes us look like we were little saints!

The cashier seemed to be annoyed at the situation.

Gee, I wonder why...

Some people just don't know what it is like to have a rambuntous three year old like my daughter.

On the contrary, some people expect you to take charge and parent your child -- that means you teach your child how to behave when out in public. And you start that teaching AT HOME. It just isn't kosher to hold off on discipline and behavioral lessons until you're, say, in that fancy restaurant and little Bhraeydeynnne starts screeching like a wounded tomcat during mating season because ZOMG, THIS PLACE IS BORING!

...oh. Right. I forgot. Actually disciplining and training your kid will just ZOMG, CRUSH HER SPIRITS! It'll KILL her CREATIVITY!

I ignored her.

That, right there, is the problem. Ignoring your misbehaving (and probably misbegotten) spawn while it runs roughshod over the store, the retail slaves, AND the other custies. This mother had the perfect teaching opportunity here, and wasted it.

Finally my daughter decided to stay near me.

See, now when I was a kid, we didn't get to "decide" to stay near mom or dad. It was ENFORCED.

Unfornately, my daughter decided to start climbing on the carasel.

I'm assuming this is the bagging CAROUSEL. (Please note the correct spelling!) The bagging carousel is not now, and has never been, a play area. It is clearly marked with signage saying (paraphrased), "DON'T CLIMB ON THIS!" Jesus haploid CHRIST, I know your kid can't read, but as the parent... yeah, you're responsible for keeping your little "angle" away from dangerous machinery.

After many other attepts to get her to stop,

Attempts. Right. How many of those went beyond, "Caydenne, please stop climbing on the carousel"? (None, I'm guessing.)

I gave her some chicken I was buying.

Packaged, frozen chicken? A pack of chicken nuggets? A couple of cornish hens?

And, uhm, "some" chicken? As in, you removed some from the package? Or you were buying multiple small units of chicken and gave her one of the small packages to play with? I'm really confused by this.

Third, and most importantly, giving your kid raw chicken to play with is a really awesome way to get Salmonella and other nasties -- especially when young kids are involved, because young kids don't know that raw chicken is a disease vector, they don't know to wash up after handling it, and chances are, your kid's hands are going from that raw (hopefully well-packaged) chicken, straight into her mouth.

As I continued putting things on the counter, my daughter was standing next to the carasel. Next thing I know, some of my daughter's chicken is on the floor.

Implying that you did, in fact, hand her a package of drums/thighs/breasts/chicken parts, and that package somehow "mysteriously" opened itself without aaaany assistance from the kid. Oi.

I demanded to know what had happened.

Well, if you'd been supervising and (gasp!) parenting your child, this wouldn't have happened! And, hey, you could have politely inquired, rather than DEMANDING the poor retail slave (who ain't making nearly enough to deal with your entitled ass) be accountable for your child.

The cashier told me she had accidently hit my daughter with the carasel.

And what did you think was going to happen if you let your girl-spawn climb all over the carousel?

Even though she said she was sorry, I didn't believe it.

Oh, ferfucksake. Ya really think the retail slave DELIBERATELY hit your kid? Seriously?! Oi...

I know she was getting annoyed at my daughter and hit her out of spite.

Of course she was annoyed -- I'm annoyed just reading about your miserable little crotch-goblin and the chaos and destruction she rained upon the poor Wally-World slaves! But to accuse her of deliberately hitting your kid? Methinks the mombie doth protest too much.

At that point I just wanted out of that store.

Funny, so did everyone who encountered you and your kid...

After all the groceries were scanned, I handed the cashier my coupons.

::headdesk:: FUCK ME IN THE NECK WITH A TWO-BY-FOUR! You're supposed to place the coupons on the product you're using it for -- BEFORE IT'S RUNG UP! Ask ANY retail slave!

All of my coupons scanned except two.

Expired, I bet.

Then she decides to be a miss coupon know it all, and goes through both of my carts looking for an item.

Because you DID IT WRONG in the first place! Had you handed over the coupons up front, before things were rung up and bagged, this would not have happened at all. Seriously, LRN 2 SHOP, lady!

That is when I got pissed. I got very loud and said boy it sure takes us a lot longer to check out than it does to shop.

Nobody's fault but your own, there -- if you had kept your daughter under control, and properly placed the coupons on the belt, you'd have been out of there in no time, flat! But, of course, it can't be YOUR fault, no, because you and your precious snowflake are PERFECT, so it must be the fault of the retail slaves. ::rolleyes::

Look in the mirror, lady, and you'll see the problem.

I also added in that the cashiers like to be busy bodies and abuse children.

Uhhh.... what? What the actual fuck? The cashier wasn't "being a busybody" by trying to give you the best service possible (rummaging through already bagged items just so YOU can use a coupon). And she certainly wasn't "abusing" your child when she ACCIDENTALLY hit her (while your child was playing on something she shouldn't have been playing on).

The cashier then gave up her fight.

What fight? The one you insist on trying to start?

She rushed the rest of order, which I thought was very rude and unprofessional.

Uhm... you just said you wanted to get the fuck outta there, and now you're bitching about the cashier rushing your order? Make up your gorram mind!

She looked like she was going to cry.

Thanks to you.

I did give her something to cry about.

Yeah, your attitude and behavior is fucking heinous. I'd be crying if I had to put up with a bitch of this magnitude.

I went to a manager and reported her.

For doing her job?

I hope they fired her.

For... doing her job.

There as no excuse for any of this at all.

For your rude, entitled ass? Nope, no excuse.

======

The entitlemoo didn't stop there, though. Oh, no. She keeps going, this time it's about her son. (This is an entirely separate incident from the one above.)

I went shopping at around 5pm with my two children. My nine year old son and three year old daughter. While I was in the clothing my son was pushing the cart.

I bet she was in the clothing, completely oblivious to her kids halfway across the store. But, eh, it's possible she was, like, right there.

He decided to get in the shopping cart. He stood at the edge to get out and the cart tipped over. He banged his head on the floor and had a bloody nose.

Yeaaaah... your kid did EXACTLY what the warnings on the cart say NOT to do! (Gee, kinda like your daughter with the bag carousel...) And worse yet, the nine year old has no fucking excuse for not being able to read (and heed!) the warning.

The team handled it pretty well. They gave us ice and helped stop the bleeding. This is not what this complaint is about.

Great, but...

However they told me that my son is not allowed to step in their shopping cart.

Yeah, that's for safety reasons, as your son so handily demonstrated.

None of this would have happened if they had more child friendly shopping carts.

No, none of this would have happened if you bothered to parent your gorram kids, and paid attention to warning labels!

::sigh::

Somehow, I get the feeling that this lady's version of "child friendly" means less "safe for kids to fool around with" and more "let my kids do whatever they want, regardless of the consequences -- I can't be arsed to watch after them while I shop."

Self-Analysis

This post came about kind of randomly. It started with a simple assignment. Assess and analyse the things I'm good at, the things I need to work on, and how I can work on those things that need work. Sounds pretty easy, most of you can probably come up with, like, five things you're good at in no time at all. Well, nothing is as easy as it looks (or sounds), and one of those "things I need to fix", the Big P, PROCRASTINATION, played its part here -- I put it off until the night before. As usual. Despite having every intention of doing the assignment the night it was assigned. And every intention of doing it "tonight" -- "tonight" being every damn night between the date this was assigned, and the date it's due. Nope. I got some stuff done on Skyrim (even though I mostly chased butterflies), read a bazillion blogs, dicked around on Facebook, played with the cat, napped, ate, took walks, played more Skyrim, and then finally, FINALLY, sat down and started on what should have been, like, five minutes of typing.

Five minutes of typing turned into an hour of typing, deep thinking, more typing, more thinking, self-editing, re-reading, more editing, and finally deciding it was "good enough". And produced the following:

I am good with written communication – some would say “excellent”, but I feel I could work to refine my skills. I have also elevated procrastination and avoidance to an art-form, and have a corresponding talent for pulling off works of genius at the last minute.

I need to work on my “people skills”, both in face-to-face and over-the-phone situations. Communicating face to face and over the phone is… extremely uncomfortable and awkward, at best, and at worst has very nearly triggered a panic attack. One solution, at least, is if (when) I have to do a cold-call, I will sit and script out what I want to say. I will still be extremely anxious, but I won’t be tongue-tied, twisted, and terrified, because I have the script in front of me and I can just read it. I really need to get a handle on the procrastination thing, because it causes more trouble than I have energy to deal with, and the extra stress just isn’t good for me. Yes, even though I come up with some brilliant last-minute work, I’d really be happier getting things done and then having time to relax without a deadline dangling precariously over my head. My organizational skills also need some major work.

Where I’m stuck is, well… how do I work on my social skills? I’m okay in extremely causal social situations, but anything more formal than “oh, hi, I’m greeting you as we pass” just… loses me. I feel like I literally need someone hanging over my shoulder and explaining, “Okay, [action xyz] is socially inappropriate, and this is why.” And the why is the important part – “because it is” just sounds like a cop-out – I need to understand the reasoning behind the taboo. I’m seriously feeling like I missed something in kindy or early grade school, here! For example, it… apparently it’s considered “bitchy” for a woman to be blunt and up-front with opinions and feelings. But at the same time, I’m constantly told that I need to talk more, or told that I should “open up and express myself”. And then when I do open up, I get yelled at, flamed, or otherwise torn down for having opinions and feelings and (gasp!) daring to express them in anything other than flowery feel-good euphemistic language. Am… am I missing something, here? Is there something wrong with what I say? Or is there something wrong with the way I’m saying it? These are, these are important questions, because I want to not “be a bitch”, as a few folks online have so eloquently put it.

And on the procrastination front? Sweet Ceiling Cat, there are just so many wonderful distractions, from the birds singing outside, to Gracie wanting attention (or a door opened), to “what’s going on in the world”, to “oh, dirty dishes – I have five minutes to kill”, to, well, just about any distraction you can think of! I think part of it is just that I’m so very easily distracted anyway, and part of it is, I don’t know, probably subconscious avoidance of work or subconscious self-sabotage, neither one of which I am equipped to tackle in any meaningful way. I suspect this particular issue may require professional help. I’m also beginning to think that perhaps my disorganization – in addition to being part of the whole ADD package – is another one of those subconscious self-sabotage things. After all, I can’t do the work if I can’t find the work in the first place, ergo, perfect avoidance strategy.

Yep. Five minute assignment turned into... that.

Fuck Winter

Seriously, can winter just be OVER, now? PLEASE? I've had enough ice and snow and cold to last a lifetime. The motorized chair simply cannot handle this shit!

Hell, I couldn't even get to my evening class on Monday, thanks to this stupid Arctic wind. And I LOVE this class! I wanted to go! It's almost the highlight of my week! I actually look forward to Monday and Wednesday evenings, for reasons other than TV programming, now.

*sigh*

I'm SO over this below-freezing weather. I just want to get outside and DO something. Even if it's just trekking over to Walgreen's for munchies. It's literally too cold to BREATHE out there!

Guess it's time to just cocoon myself in blankets and wait it out. -.-;

WTF? Since When Is Pregnancy and Parenthood a "Special Need"?

Ignoring the demotivational text, since when is being pregnant or having a small child a disability? Priority seating on transit is for SENIORS AND THE DISABLED, not lazy-ass women with small children!

Cue whines of, "But I'm a MOMMEEEEE! You don't UNDERSTAAAAAND!"

Yeah. I do understand. You crapped out a kid. You're not entitled to jack shit, lady, so stop acting like you're SOOOO SPESHUL for getting knocked up and giving birth. Seriously. If your kid is small enough to be carried, you can carry it to the back of the bus. If it's old enough to walk, you can walk it to the back of the bus. And while I've got your attention, SHUT YOUR DAMN KID UP! Yeah, yeah, kids make noise, sure, but SCREAMING is not acceptable, and we DON'T have to put up with it. It's your kid, it's your fucking job to teach it what's socially appropriate. If you don't, someone else WILL.

Cue indignant, "How DARE you discipline my child!"

Well, lady, someone's gotta do it, and if you won't, I WILL. And I don't give a shit if it "crushes his spirit" or "stifles his creativity". The sun doesn't shine out your kid's ass, so stop acting like it does.

More on Bad Baby Names

I know I picked on blacks a bit in my last name rant. Well, "kreeaytyve", "yooneek", and downright awful names aren't limited at all by race.

ESPN -- pronounced "Es-pen" (I shit you not, it's true!) What's next, naming your kid NASCAR? I can only imagine the poor kid saddled with this name is from the South, and probably from a trailer park.

Look... man... just... THINK, please, before naming your crotch-droppings. Make sure it's something that isn't going to embarrass the poor kid, or become a hindrance in life.

RANT: What the hell are these people THINKING?

Woman Claims She Was "Sterilized Against [her] Will"

Nine kids, on SSI, her mother has custody of three of the little crotch-monkeys, and this woman is bitching about how she wants MOAR KIDS and the hospital allegedly sterilized her against her will

First off, she has nine -- NINE -- children, each with different fathers.

Secondly, Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma? Not a disability. GET A JOB.

Third, the relevant documents (consent forms) are conveniently "missing". (They were sent to her previous lawyer, apparently, and then went "poof".) I suspect she got hold of them somehow, and destroyed them.

Fourth, we have the minor detail that she had previously sued a spermicide company because she got pregnant. Now I'm confused -- suing because you got pregnant, and now suing because you can't? This is NOT adding up.

Fifth... Look, I'm all for reproductive rights, but what about a little responsibility, here? This woman has proven, time and again, that she is NOT responsible enough to be a parent, that she has no desire to do anything for the kids, they're just cash-cows to her. More kids? She gets more money.

THIS is why I support the idea of parenting licenses. Anyone who wishes to be a parent should have to pass a rigorous exam testing their parenting skills, patience, intelligence, should meet a minimal income/resource* requirement, and for the love of all that is sacred, they should have to prove that they can RAISE the kid.

I have chosen to be child-free because I know I'm not responsible enough, I'm not financially secure, I can't provide physically or emotionally for a child. Nor do I have the patience to be a parent. I have made the intelligent choice, to NOT BREED, instead of popping out fuck-trophies just because I have a uterus and ovaries.

Seriously, people, THINK before you BREED! Is the world really better off because you shat out another "precious snowflake"?

And while I'm on the topic of "precious snowflakes" what the HELL is wrong with some people? Traditional names, great. Ethnic names, totally awesome. Names with religious significance? Sure! I'll even take hippy-dippy names like Moonbeam -- they're pretty, and many times fit the personality of the kid.

But this idiotic trend of "unique" names has GOT to go. NOW. If I see one more "Brytynnyye" or "Jaydynn" or some nonsensical shit like, "Le-a" (hint: the dash is not silent, it's seriously pronounced "ledasha") I'm gonna flip. Just give your kids nice, normal names, and save them a lot of trauma in school. I guarantee that little "Diammond Sparckle Zedekeyah Lilly Ann Martin" (see linked article) is going to be thoroughly traumatized, if only by constantly having to correct others on spelling. Hell, I'll bet a 20-sack (2 grams) of cannabis that, in 18 years, she's working at a strip club, thanks to her idiot parents and their habit of giving their kids yooneek naymez. While I'm on the topic, I'd also like to note that inner-city blacks** need to stop making up names like "Daejwan" and that adding "La", "Da", or "Ta" to the start of an existing name just screams, "poor inner-city ghetto trash" -- your kids are not getting employed with names like that. (And we're all wondering why crime is so high... CONNECT THE FUCKING DOTS! -- "black-sounding" name = NO JOB = higher crime.)



*By which I mean, not money, but a reliable support system (i.e. grandparents, friends, other family members willing to baby sit or otherwise help out with the kid) so the prospective parent can continue to work and provide for the future child.

**I'm tired of seeing people throw their lives away like this. It's entirely unnecessary, and just serves to further stigmatize the community they live in. Take some fucking PRIDE in yourself, and CLEAN UP YOUR SHIT.

EDIT: For more shits and giggles over horrible names, check out Baby's Named a Bad, Bad Thing - I'm in stitches over here!

Homophobe Parent Behaves Like An Ass

Parent Files Complaint Against Gay Teacher for Corrupting Child's Innocence

What did the teacher do? Why, she announced to her class that she was getting married to another woman! And this asshat "parent" made a big fucking deal over it.

Why not just be happy for the woman? She's getting married to the one she loves, which is a beautiful thing!

But some people just can't wrap their heads around the idea that love isn't restricted to people of the opposite sex. (Or, thinking of a triad I know, solely the cisgendered.*)

I don't get what the big deal is over gay marriage. We're people, we live, we love, we want to formally declare that love -- JUST LIKE YOU. "Civil unions" won't cut it; I seem to recall a time when "separate but equal" was applied to another group of people, and that didn't work out well at all. Civil rights are for ALL people, regardless of color, gender, sexual orientation, or any other arbitrary division you can think of.

*cisgendered -- this is the term for people who are not transgendered, that is, our physical gender and our mental gender match up.

"Because She Needed It"

I just read an excellent, if disturbing, article over at Box Turtle Bulletin -- "Because She Needed It"

In short, a man was fired for harassing a fellow employee, who happens to be a lesbian, over her mentioning her engagement (and upcoming marriage) to her partner.

He told her that her lifestyle* is "deviant", among other things.

The irony, the sick twist in this, is that he was in charge of making sure the company's non-discrimination policy was upheld.

So the company fires him for, basically, being a dick towards his co-worker. And now he's claiming he was fired because, get this, he's a Christian, and "she needed to hear that her 'lifestyle' is 'deviant' and 'sinful'." *snicker*

I don't understand this.

Why did she "need" to hear that she's "deviant"? Or that she's a "sinner"? Or any of the ever-growing number of insults and slurs often used against LGBTs?

Why couldn't he just be happy for her, congratulate her on her engagement, and move on?

Why did he feel compelled to insult and belittle her, over something so trivial as who she was marrying?

For that matter, why do Christians feel the need to constantly (over)share their religion?

This is America. You can't sneeze without hitting a Bible. We've ALL heard the spiel already -- Son of gawd, died fer yer sins, repent, DELIVERANCE! -- and for those of us who've rejected it in favor of other religions, or for no religion at all, it gets old. Fast.


No other religion pushes as hard as Christianity. Sure, you'll sometimes see Hare Krishnas, or what have you, but 99% of the time, when you get proselytized at, it's some flavor of Christianity. (Most likely Evangelical, Mormon, or JW. They can be fun to play with.) I've never been approached by a Muslim and asked if I've found Allah. Never had a Jew try to convert me to Judaism. Never met a pagan or witch of any flavor (or either Path) who tried to recruit me. The few Satanists I know (online)... no pressure there.

But Christians! Ah! No, they HAVE to make everything about Christ. Most Christians are cool, really, but I seem to run into mostly the pushy obnoxious fundamentalist types. I've been told (with a straight face, no less) that "GOD will give you new legs." (I distinctly remember being too stunned to make a witty reply.) I've been told that my disability is a result of sin -- mine, my parents', my birth-parents', my grandparents' (both real and, uh, genetic). The hell is this shit?

I, uh, I should get back to what I was saying before I went on a tangent/rant, there.

So, yeah, Christian douchebag is fired for being a bigoted dick. Files a lawsuit. Claims that his lesbian co-worker "needed" to hear that her "lifestyle" is "deviant", and that he was fired over his religion. For fuck's sake, he's the goddamn MANAGER IN CHARGE OF ENFORCING THE COMPANY ANTI-DISCRIMINATION POLICY! You think he'd have KNOWN that he was breaking the rules. Of course, he's a Christian, so he gets a free pass on obnoxious, annoying, and even illegal behavior.... *eyeroll* He's "not perfect, just forgiven."

Overhearing normal conversations about his co-worker's upcoming wedding is somehow "forcing" her "homosexual lifestyle" "down his throat."

But when he deliberately seeks her out and goes all Jesus-junkie, calls her a "deviant", and so on, it's just "sharing the good news."

Can someone PLEASE explain this godawful hypocrisy to me?

The other thing I wanted to riff on, here, was the title. "Because she needed it." Those are four words that I don't ever want to hear again. It's nothing more than an idiotic deflect-the-blame dick move. Every abuser has used it. "I hit her because she needed hitting." Yeah. It was a trigger. I did a *shudder-twitch-gag* when I read it.

Nobody needs to be abused. Verbally, emotionally, mentally, or physically. What this man did was not only against company policy, but it was abuse. The company was right to fire him, and I think charges should be brought against this asshole.

Religion is NOT an excuse (or free pass) for bigotry, hate, or abuse, and I'm tired of seeing it used as such.


* There is no such thing as a "homosexual lifestyle". It's not a choice. And it certainly isn't "deviant".

What. The. Fuck.

Girl, 11, Gives Birth On Wedding Day

Read the article.

Go on, read it. I'll still be here when you're done.

Give it a minute to sink in.

Then you'll understand why my reaction went something like this:

What the fuck?

11?

11?!

With a 19 YEAR OLD?!

And she had a BABY?

Quite possibly the most disturbing part of the article is where she said that she "has a new toy."

BABIES ARE NOT TOYS! AAAUGH!

WHERE THE HELL WERE HER PARENTS?

WHAT THE HELL WAS HE THINKING?

GYAHHH!

Sometimes I hate humanity.

Things You Don't Think About #1 - Family Medical History

I had my psych intake today, and it went well. I was bothered by one thing: filling out a medical history form.

You know, I can list my meds, I can give contact information, all that stuff I know, I can fill in. Even most of the surgeries and immunizations... well, the major ones.

Not a problem, right?

Until I reach the half-page section titled "Family History".

Tens of checkboxes for various conditions from depression to heart disease, and a number of things you really wouldn't ordinarily think about. After all, your parents are your parents, they fed you, clothed you, took care of you when you were sick, and you don't think about the genetics of the situation.

Obviously, when they thought about this form, they didn't think about it, either. It just doesn't come up, I guess, but I think it's a potentially interesting issue to explore.

So I just scrawled: "Unknown -- Adopted!" across the checklist.

I'm off to bed, now.

Oh, and the person I saw said that even though my sleep schedule is way off, at least it's consistent.

Good night!